There’s a lot of buzz around the ‘cool girl’ beauty movement – rumours and legends spread like wildfire about what ‘cool girl’ does and what she likes. But who the hell is she anyway?!

Googling the term leads me to eyeroll-inducing headlines like “What’s the deal with cool girl beauty?” (That’s what I wanna know!) along with “5 Cool-Girl Beauty Trends for Spring Brides”, “Top 5 Picks from this Cool-Girl Beauty Brand” “7 Cool-Girl Beauty Brands to Check out if you Love Glossier” and “How Glossier harnessed the Myth of Cool Girl Makeup”. Glossier seems to be reigning supreme in the category, with Milk as a close runner-up. (imo, Milk tries a little too hard. Some of their products seem so impractical! Cool Girl doesn’t want that!)

So, who is this girl everyone keeps talking about?

I think the first thing to learn is that she isn’t the same for men as it is for women. We all remember (and lived for) the monologue in Gone Girl, but the girl we’re looking for isn’t her. It’s not about burgers or blowjobs (thank god…) but about being low-maintenance and laid back. But in a chic, casually wealthy way.

Cool Girl is effortless, a chilled-out big sister type who only uses two skincare products, probably from a French pharmacy brand. She’s tall, could probably get away with washing her face with bar soap without ill effects, and has plenty of money to spend but nobody knows what she actually does for a living. Maybe she’s a little androgynous-looking, she might be a model or blogger. She wears calvins, levis and crisp cotton shirts. She applies her makeup in the back of a taxi or in the elevator, using as few products as possible. She doesn’t bake or contour or wing her eyeliner. She doesn’t own brushes, just smudges her makeup on with a pinky finger.

Basically, she’s perfect without even trying.

Basically, she’s a complete fairy tale.

Maybe you think you know of a cool girl – what about Alexa Chung! Or that french model! No. They’re not her. They’re real people. Cool Girl was invented in a meeting room by a bunch of marketing executives, probably. Let me assure you – no fictional lady is ever as amazing or complex as women are in real life. And that’s fine. That’s interesting. And most of all, real.